Nick had a dentist appointment, so I decided to take my 15 page packet from the oncologist to fill out while I was waiting for him. I was about half way done when Nick's hygienist came to get me to tell me that it was time to discuss Nick and surgical procedures on his mouth, teeth pulled, etc. and I completely glazed over.
I stopped her half way through pulling this tooth and the canine tooth that and said "I can't deal with this right now, can it wait 3-4 months, will that be detrimental to my son." She looked at me kinda funny and said, "no, I don't know, is something wrong." And I just said, "I start chemo in a few weeks and I just can't do it right now." She smiled and said, lets just get an xray and go from there. She walked away and I just thought there is no way I can do this, not now, I am such a baby.
About five minutes go by and she comes back and waves me into the room. I told her I was sorry for blurting it out and she just smiled. The Dentist came in, big Columbian kisses and hellos and he tells me the very long difficult canine tooth explanation, but ends it with "You take care of you now and Nick in January." I turn to walk out, but as I walked into the room I had gathered all of Nick's books and my papers from the waiting room. On top of the pile was the packet for the oncology with the two optional Dr's business cards paper clipped to the top of the paper. He says to me
"Is this your Dr.?" pointing to the business card
"I dont' know, I have the option of either of these" showing him both cards
"Oh, Donita, you must go to Dr. Oncologist, she is the best Dr. on the planet, she's a patient here and a dear friend, you can use my name call and tell her I sent you." (say that is a sexy Colombian voice, he has an awesome voice-and his wife knows-she's ok with it)
"Ok" I said thinking this was crazy or fate or my luck (working in my favor)
Dentist's wife yells from the front desk, "Is that Dr. Oncology, she is such a dear, you will love her she is just the best." as she comes at me with tears in her eyes and her arms wide open for more Colombian hugs and loves. And I was absolutely cool with it, I love this Dentist and his wife. We talk a while longer about her and I joke that I will see them tomorrow because I have a dentist appointment tomorrow.
Nick and I head to the car and I called Dr. Oncologist's office. NOT to force an appointment, but to tell them that I did indeed have a particular Dr. that I wanted to see and don't forget I'm a Texan and I wanted to share my 20minute story with anyone in Dr. Oncologist's office who would listen.
They didn't really want to listen, I got halfway through my story two times and was put on hold twice, then headed over to a girl who's name started with S. I can't remember exactly what her name is, but I will just call her Sourpuss. Sourpuss comes on a says (you know, the standard)
"Who is this?"
"Caledonia Wheeler W-h-e-e-l-e-r yesterday I dropped off my folder and I was asked if I wanted a particular Dr. and I said NO, but today I was at the dentist and my dentist knows Dr. Oncologist and-
"What Dr. do you want, I have you with Dr. Oncologist"
"Oh, beautiful, that is perfect, when is the date?"
"I was going to call you today but you beat me to it, it's Oct. 15"
(ECT is now playing the part of Donita)
"That's the SOONEST you can get me in?"
"Where do you live?"
"East Hollywood"
"You want to go to West?"
"No, I don't want to go to west, I changed surgeons to stay here and this is where I need to go, ok when is the next open appointment for the other dr.?"
"Oct 15"
"Oh, really, so neither Dr is available for 17 days?"
"It's not that long"
Really, really, it's not that long. Hey Soupuss, until you've had your boob squashed, five biopsies, two surgeries and now chemo, you can't tell me how long 17 days is. Could you wait 17 days for your paycheck, for your child to see a Dr. if he has the flu, for your gas to fill up, for your birth control pill, for your ANYTHING, SEVENTEEN days, I'm going to have a nervous breakdown before SEVENTEEN days gets here. Plus, my Mom is coming next week and I need her help when I'm actually having something done!!
"Yes, it really is a long time and you're not making me feel very good about this at all. Yesterday when I dropped off the packet, I called back and asked for a timeline. I asked how long before I would go for my first appointment, etc and she said it would be maximum two weeks and I would be in treatment in two weeks."
"Well, she doesn't know any of that, I'm the scheduler, do you want it or not?"
"Yes, I will take the appointment" and at this point my voice is cracking and I'm trying not to cry.
"WAIT, don't hang up, I need some information Mrs. Wheeler"
"What is your phone number?" Said Sourpuss
"IF you have my file in front of you, look down, both numbers are there." ECT lovingly replies
"Oh, yea, here they are, I need your address" Stupid Sourpuss
"Now open the file, see my license, it should be right there." ECT
"Ok, it's here and who's the insurance under?" SP
"My husband, Whitney Wheeler" ECT
"There's no gay marriage in FL"
"No, no there isn't and WHITNEY IS A MAN, HE'S MY HUSBAND" ECT screams
"When's HIS birthday?"
"6-13-63"
"60 what?"
"Sixty THREE"
"What?"
"T T H H R E E "
"Ok, you are down for 10-15"
And with that, we were done.
I was so mad, my face was bright red. Here we go again, it's going to take FOREVER to do anything and meanwhile, if one of those little lovely cancer cells broke off, it's just FLOATING AROUND my body waiting for a new home while Soupuss just floats through her "it's not that long" life.
I immediately called Dentist's wife and said with a very shaky voice
"I don't usually call in favors, but I just called Dr. Oncologist's office and dealt with a less than pleasant scheduler who told me it would be 17 days before I would/could get in, I'm going to have a nervous breakdown if I have to wait 17 days."
"Oh, Donita (Colombian sweet voice) we will call her tonight, both of us, and we will talk to Dr. Oncologist. See you tomorrow"
So, do I think I'll get my appointment moved up, probably not, but now to Dr. Oncologist I won't be a "file" I will be a "person" and that is good for me. I guess I'll find out tomorrow. Meanwhile, and a few phone calls later, I have been talked into calling the office manager tomorrow and letting her know Sourpuss's tactics for scared, close to out of their mind, crazy cancer (awaiting chemo and radiation) patients. She could have been much more understanding and sweet(er).
I will say on a positive note, it made me feel great to have my dentist tell me that the oncologist card I was holding was "one of the best Dr's in FL" and the reason the hygienist was so funny when I told her about me having cancer, is because she's a survivor and she knows.
Favorite cancer quote so far this pink path (seriously, not sarcastically) "You want your hair to fall out because you a) know it's working b) want the cancer to "fall all the way out". You want it to work, work as hard as it can, because that's its job, it's a good thing if your hair all falls out, really, it's a good thing."
That was so wonderful for me to hear, best thing I've heard so far, really.
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